I sent this in an email to Jian this morning after sending him something about yesterday, et. al. I would spend my time writing about what happened today but it was pretty uneventful as compared to yesterday. I can't predict when I'll go back to complaining about the petty emotional stuff in my life but give me a few days and I'll be back to normal. I promise you.In any case, here goes.
This can be a troubling situation when you're in my place: away from home, no parents to reassure you that things will be okay (if they even believe that themselves), and nearly everyone down the hall seems to believe that repeat attacks are inevitable and coming by the end of the night. Welcome to the world, indeed.
The girl in the next room over said that the attacks came because of a document that was signed 10 years ago to the date at a certain hour *(9:11) and therefore would be repeated at the 9pm hour.
For once, I'm trying to be positive and it's hard. You know me, I'm a drama queen when it comes to certain things and I'm making all attempts to stay away from that. I mean, who knew that there would be people working against my rare positive mindset?
I argue that we're the land of the peace because we usually don't see this much hostility from another country (if it even was...the jury IS still out on that one so I'm open to the idea that whoever is responsible may be a US citizen/group) being acted out on our soil. I realize that my statement was naive in the respects you listed, but I'm not used to seeing such destruction in a location only 2 hours south of my home, one block away from my late grandfather's 1940's law office (if that even exists anymore) and across the water's from my grandmother's condo. Can't wait to get the phone call from her about what she woke up to yesterday morning.
I see you took note of my failure to mention or place much emphasis on the concurrent Washington distruction. Good job. Watching images of Washington yesterday and hearing of it's evacuation was also troubling because I'd just been there not too long ago and had visited the Pentagon (well, the parking lot of it...does that count?)
President Bush, or the cowboy as you so correctly put it, made no qualms about punishing those who committed this crime and those who "harbored it." A group of us watched his speech in the lobby of our dorm last night and I have to honestly say that I didn't really feel that much safer/confident about the bombings. I'm very insecure about this and wish that I could go back to the world I woke up to on MONDAY morning. But I suppose things do happen for a reason and the reason for this is to wake us up. The US isn't perfect and isn't invulnerable. We piss people off and can't afford to be so comfortable so as to be this shocked when people want to pay us back for something.
The only peace I did find in the wake of all this was a candlelight vigil held out on the student union at around 10pm last night. My parents had come to visit and drop off some much needed supplies and after they left, I made my way over there alone but for the first time all day didn't feel as such. One of the friars lead a sermon and they sang two verses of Amazing Grace. I finally felt as though someone understood how important it was for me to feel a LITTLE optimistic that things will be okay. I think my favorite line of the night was from the friar on my hall who lead the group and said "Do not damn those who have done this to our nation. For only the damned can curse the damned." Like you, I also hope that we'll find the right course of retribution for this and that it won't be too outlandish or just plain stupid.
I'm not a Catholic so I didn't really comply or fit in with the way some things were expressed last night, but I've found a place here in a way I never could in highschool and for now, at least feel SPIRITUALLY protected which is better than nothing.
