I've had two fucked up dreams over the past two nights.Thursday night: I was at my own wedding, in a nice and beautiful white dress. I walked around talking with all my friends who showed up and a few requested to get me and my husband in personal photos. I agreed but then realized I couldn't remember what my husband looked like. It came time to throw the bouquet and it hit the ceiling as I stood on a chair to throw it back. After getting back up to throw it again, I fell off the chair and the bouquet falls to pieces. A few days later in the dream, I'm out walking and discover that Nick is my husband.
Friday night: I was in some sort of townhouse like they have for the upperclassmen here. Dave was there and approaches me out of the blue. He tells me how he's changed and his life is in order now. We start making out and begin having sex on a couch in front of people. It was good, I remember feeling that. Before it gets too climactic, Nick and his friends (or a group of people I associated with him) are walking in. He gets appalled at what I was doing, saying that if I cared I would have waited for him and shit. I leave Dave to tell him that maybe this means we weren't meant to get back together. I turn around and Dave is gone.
Outside of dreamland however, I went to the diner last night with Stacey, Kevin, Carim and Paul, the latter of which showed up after we arrived. Before we took off for the diner, I took a few shots of Smirnoff Ice Raspberry twist. This was about 20 minutes after I took my anties so I got drunk really...really, fast.
I don't much remember what happened when we all got together. I'm kind of embarrassed too because I know they went back and told Nick what was going on.
What gets me is this: he tells me that he wants to get his life together so that he can be a better man for me yet in the meanwhile his activities include playing Diablo 2/Tekken 4 on playstation and working nights at Ruby Tuesdays. That's all I know. It pisses me off that he does one thing and then says another.
Pisses me off a lot.
